Nervous

by HM

Imagine walking onto a stage. There is an enormous flood of light and you are immediately blinded by this immense artificial sun. Then, the second you walk off stage, you run outside and start blowing chunks. That's what it was like for me in my first circus show, "Inspiruption."

When I heard that my circus was going to perform, I was nervous. I had so many anxiety dreams that I started feeling apprehensive about sleeping. I was very nervous.
The weekend of the show came too fast, and we were still making last minute changes. I didn't know what to do. As we sat backstage, my friend Ron would peek out through a small hole in the curtain to tell us the status and size of the audience. The first show went great other then some minor kinks with cues and lighting. Everything went surprisingly smoothly, until the last show.

After our third performance, it was a bright mid-Sunday and just about lunch time. My mom called me to ask if I wanted some food, and I didn't miss my chance. I begged her to go to the Can't Fail Cafe. I ordered my favorite thing off the menu, a chocolate shake, fries, and the mouthwatering, enormous, and cooked to perfection, Mile High Club Sandwich: four stacks of pure awesome piled one on to another.

Without thinking of the show I had to perform in a half an hour, I chowed down and ate the whole thing. Big mistake! As soon as the show started I was already feeling nauseous. I paced in circles trying to calm myself down. I took multiple trips to the restroom in hopes that I'd come back feeling better, but nothing worked. I was in panic. I started to feel a slow rumble in my stomach and my legs started to shake. I ran out the back entrance and puked. Luckily, our second-in-command director, Slater, had some mouthwash. I swished and spit multiple times, and although my mouth was as fresh as a new bar of peppermint soap, my stomach still felt like an acid bath. As much as I didn't want to perform, I knew that the show had to go on. I put on a fake smile and walked onstage just in time for my cue. After the show, when I told everyone what had happened, they completely understood; most of them had been in very similar situations. We went out for gelato, and I even ended up laughing at myself for my nerves. I realized that I always have to be confident. I also realized that I shouldn't eat a monster sandwich with a milkshake and fries right before doing flips in front of an audience.